My Story

 Our journey has been surprising and unexpected all along. I come from a family blessed with incredible fertility. I am the youngest of 5 children. I watched all my older sisters have children with ease. I Heard stories of my grandmother who had 7 children; 3 sets of twins, and 1 single. . .Amazing fertility! It was always a joke in our family that if you wash you and your husbands pants together,  you're pregnant! I was in this naive world that getting pregnant was easy. It was the norm. When my husband and I were ready and started trying, I just "assumed" it would be easy. After 4 months, we were pregnant. I was so happy to have this "blessed gene" as well. We were excited. Everything was going as planned. At my first Doctor appointment, we learned we had miscarried at 9 weeks. We were very sad and disappointed, but got through it knowing we will be on our way soon again and it will all be ok. What is a couple months in the big scheme of things?  Month after month went by. Confusion set in. What's going on? By the time I reached my due date, still not even on my way, I was devastated. We had such high expectations every single month which made the let down to be gruesome. I reached out to my Doctor for help. What is wrong? Why isn't this happening? They never listened. Told me it was just bad timing. That I got pregnant which shows success, so just keep trying. I couldn't live in such turmoil anymore. Something must be wrong. This is not the norm I knew. I finally got fed up with them and searched for a new Doctor. One that could help us figure this out. He listened. He agreed that we should be pregnant by now. Oh it felt good to be validated! We began testing. It felt good to finally be doing something about it. We found problems. I was not ovulating. My hormone levels were really low. This could be due to endometriosis or ovarian cysts. I had no symptoms of either of these other than infertility. My doctor encouraged me to get laparoscopic surgery so that we could know for certain. The only way to find out is by going in with the microscope. What? Surgery? I've gotten pregnant so it is impossible for me to have such problems! I thought it would just be a simple fix. Not this. We prayed and went to the temple. We felt strongly that surgery was the route we needed to go. Surprised, I took that leap of faith and trusted my Heavenly Father. I underwent the surgery. Not knowing if they would find anything and this would all be a waste of money and pain. As soon as I woke up from surgery, I asked if they found anything. My husband told me they found endometriosis and removed it all. I immediatley said a prayer thanking my Heavenly Father for helping me. It was amazing. We had a new excitement. We must be close. My doctor wanted to put me on infertility pills. He is an aggressive doctor and always said to us, "lets just get you pregnant". Clomid, monthly ultrasound appointments, progesterone, and HCG shots became my new reality. Month after month after month, still no luck. It made no sense. To us or our doctor. Why is it STILL not working with all this help? My body was doing what it was supposed to. My husband had no problems. . .Nothing. Our doctor put us into the "Black Box"of Infertility. Basically when they don't know why its not happening because both partners are working fine. We have tried Artificial Insemination (IUI) multiple times. We do not know what our future holds. Surely one of these times it must work. We try to remain positive and optimistic and look for ways to be happy as we go through this difficult journey.