November 18, 2011
Never Judge
Today my visiting teacher came over. The message she chose to share with me from conference was.....wait for it...."We are not supposed to delay having children and starting a family". Wow. Are you serious? I had spent my morning feeling very heavy hearted with my situation. Trying very hard to be strong and not let the holiday season get to me. When she said that, and continued on with what a blessing and privilege it is, and how it is fulfilling our Heavenly Father's Plan, I lost it. My blood began to boil. How dare you judge me. How dare you just "assume" we don't want children. How dare you think this is even any of your business anyway! I think our "culture" can be so incredibly judgmental. You have no idea what is going on behind closed doors. You have no idea what mountains and hills people are trying to climb. You have no idea the amount of pain someone feels. Never ever judge. Period.
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Why would a visiting teacher ever give that lesson! That is a very personal thing!...But on second thought, maybe it was so that you could tell her your trial and then your visiting teachers can be there and support you.
ReplyDeleteI had a Visiting teacher give a lesson on the importance of making sacrifices to stay home with your children and not work outside the home. . . while I was working full-time trying to get Adam through school. I sat there very offended for a while but then realized that she couldn't possibly have known my situation and my reasoning. I was at peace with the decision that I had made so her problems with my decision were exactly that. . . her problem. You know your heart is in the right place, so don't let others ignorance sway you otherwise!
ReplyDeleteAnother thing to remember is that later in Uchdorf's talk he mentions the importance of respecting others and their "life plan." I am certain she was not judging you in any way. She simply picked a conference talk; my favorite, actually.
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